Disciplining a child with the carrot and stick method

Disciplining a child is difficult. Many ways have been suggested. One way to discipline our children is through the carrot and stick method. “Carrots” are privileges that must be earned or incentives that will motivate them to complete their task. These rewards are like watching TV, playing a computer game, or going out to play with your friends.

The “sticks” on the other hand, are punishments or disciplinary actions for work not done or when a child disobeys his parents. This punishment does not mean spanking the child. It can be done in a number of ways, for example, a time-out, punishment, or removal of a privilege like watching TV.

A time out works well with older children. A two year old will not be able to understand the meaning of a time out. If she has to give one as a punishment, she must do it immediately or her son will be confused. A general rule of thumb is one minute for each year of the child’s age. Sometimes a hug and a word of comfort after time out also help a child know that punishing is not about you not wanting it, but about your behavior.

While you are clear about what behaviors will be punished, parents should also keep in mind that rewarding good behaviors is also important. The positive effect that praise can have should not be underestimated. For example, saying you’re proud of your child for completing chores is often more effective than punishing your child for the opposite behavior: not doing chores. Parents need to be specific when giving their praise; don’t just say, “Good job.” Discipline is not just about punishing, but also about acknowledging good behavior.