How to deal with other people’s emotions

I have literally seen thousands of ways to deal with other people’s emotional drama. However, few of them result in positive change. I am more inclined to say that what you do is not as important as “why you do it”. What I say here is to make sure that you are authentic.

A client called me and wanted some consulting advice because he was guilty of something. They wanted to “get over it” but I reminded them that nature creates guilt for a certain reason. Maybe it would be better if they changed whatever it was they were doing that was causing them guilt.

Dealing with other people’s emotions is a great test of strength. Can you stand still in the storm? If you remain ambivalent to his emotion, you are absolutely available for communication, while if you react, you now know that his emotions were actually yours.

You see, nature produces other people’s emotions that reflect the emotions that are going on inside of us. Someone is mad at you, well unfortunately it means “you’re mad at you”. So if you are reacting to his emotion, you are.

Not reacting to someone’s emotion can seem a bit harsh because you’re not buying it. However, when a person is drowning, you usually don’t jump in and create two people in trouble, you get ropes and life preservers and things to help. So reacting means you got caught.

If there is no reaction, “their stress is not your stress.” If there is a reaction within you, then they have helped you evolve. Avoid blaming people for how you feel, instead say “thank you, I never realized what was going on inside of me until now.”

More tips later.

WithSpirit

chris