You are being thought of!
“Do not believe everything you think”.
-Byron Katie
Since I’m not one to sit back after 30 years of effort and say, “Try harder,” I decided to investigate this private realization. As it would happen, this “you are in charge of your thoughts” statement is not entirely true. But you already knew.
What we CAN control is our response to these thoughts. But these thoughts appear spontaneously. You can deliberately think of a statement or affirmation, sure, but what gave you the idea to think of it? Say oh! It is understood. It just showed up, right?
Jung had a term called the Collective Unconscious; the Vendata Community has a term, “the causal body.” Both explain that thoughts come from SOMEWHERE (call it God, Reality, or the Great Beyond), but they do not originate FROM YOU. You are BEING thought!
You will notice that you are digesting food and taking in air in the same way. It’s just happening. Your agreement to these processes is not required. It will happen with or without your vote. Sit for a moment and notice this.
So what is my point?
Well, I had, er, a ‘came in’ THOUGHT that suggested I write an article about this for you; to allow others to access this same insight. At this point, this information may seem like TERRIBLE news, because you apparently have no control over your thoughts. But isn’t this realization also a kind of liberation?
If you are not the thinker, you can simply observe the thoughts and decide (you still have free will) which ones to respond to emotionally or physically. So you can have a feeling or take an action. Or you can dismiss the thought altogether.
Byron Katie, of “The Work” fame, bases her entire show on this premise. She tells us that every stressful thought is a lie. Doesn’t that sound INSULTING at first glance? But what she means is that if the thought disturbs us, it is not true. It goes against reality or our own truth or both.
“I’m too fat and ugly” could be a thought that appears when you look in the mirror. That’s right? Are you really TOO fat? Are you considered ugly by everyone? Even your dog? Well, maybe you could lose some weight, but currently you are as big or small as you are. It’s just a fact. You are alive and appear to be mobile (you walked in front of a mirror, right?), so perhaps the definition of fat is subjective. Are you REALLY grossed out by yourself, or are you trying to time your viewing to coincide with some much-repeated societal opinion on TV and in nightclubs?
If circumstances were different and you were on a deserted island with no food, are you too fat now? Or are you properly equipped to withstand isolation until help arrives (compared to your size 5 buddy who definitely won’t make it through the first month?).
Yes, yes, I hear you. You think this is crazy and will keep you alone and judged by your neighbors and coworkers if you adopt this new way of looking at thoughts. These various people who walk around noticing your clothes, your hair, and your butt (and seem to be very important to you, maybe more important than YOU). They really are focused on YOU, aren’t they? Well, since you’ve been trying to please them since you were around 12 years old, and you haven’t really lived up to it consistently, if ever, what do you say? in which they randomly enter yours?
Because I have to tell you, it’s actually a lot of FUN watching them go in and out all day. And knowing that I can decide which to attend to and which to ignore makes me feel VERY in charge, not out of control. How about I try it my way?
it is just a thought….
“A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It is not our thoughts, but our attachment to our thoughts, that causes suffering. Attaching to a thought means believing that it is true, without inquiring. A belief is a thought that we have been holding onto a, often for years.” – Byron Katie (Loving What It Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life)